Lately I have been making a conscious effort to change my life. It is partly due to the reality that with out change then I will never be able to accomplish what I want to accomplish in life or to live the life the God has created me to live. Too often our dreams and good intentions are lost because we didn’t do the hard work of making the necessary changes to our lives.
Positive changes always take work, some are harder than others, but the all involve determining what needs to be done and doing it. Negative changes are much easier. They sneak up on us and all of a sudden we realize that we have changed and we don’t like it.
One of the changes that I have been making is a change to my diet. My beautiful and wonderful girlfriend has encouraged me to adopt a healthier way of eating focused on eating more meat and vegetables and less processed food and sugar (which is in about everything that is sold as food). I have been eating this way for the past week and so far it has been fairly easy to do. It took work to plan our a grocery list and to actually cook meals, but now I have been enjoying the cooking and discovering foods that I never knew I liked before (zucchini).
To go along with this I got a gym membership here in town. I have always liked to work out but it has always been easy for me to find some excuse not to do it. But for the past month or so I have been going to the gym every afternoon and I have enjoyed it. It gets me out of the house, so I am not saying that I will do it later, and I get to interact with people I wouldn’t have met otherwise (though this doesn’t happen as much as I would like). Having a time, place, and paying money each month has helped me keep up with the change.
So while those two changes have come fairly easy some other changes have not. One is that I have a terrible time keeping a consistent time with God. I have tried to schedule it at different times during the day and I have tried different study methods and journals and nothing I do seems to work. I get so easily distracted. I have even removed the internet and my Playstation from life and still I find other things to distract me. Often it will be with a book and while I justify it by saying that it is a book about the Bible reading another persons thoughts about Scripture is not the same as spending time in Scripture.
Another change I find myself have a difficult time making meeting and talking with people. I am an extreme introvert and I find it difficult to talk to people that I don’t really know (this includes extended family members that I don’t know very well) and so it is difficult for me to make phone calls to set up appointments. I need to get my car worked on and I can’t seem to work up the courage to pick up the phone and make the call. It becomes so frustrating because I want to change but I am finding it very difficult to do it.
I know that change doesn’t come easy, but I know that it is absolutely vital for following Jesus. We can’t follow Jesus and remain the way we are. I have also come to accept that part of faith is found in this struggle to make changes. Faith is seen in not giving up just because things get difficult or because we have stumbled and fallen. Faith is seen in dusting ourselves off and beginning again to change the way we live.
The life of faith is a life of change. It isn’t going to be easy, but in the end it is exactly what we need.
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